I weigh myself every morning right before getting in the shower. When I was in the thick of trying to lose weight, there were mornings that I stepped on the scale and didn't get any thinner, or even went up in weight. It devastated me. My natural reaction was to first be depressed and fatalistic, then gradually move to unrealistic. I made big plans while washing my hair. It went like this:"Oh no! This is terrible, I am never going to get past this stage. I am always going to be fat. Stupid fat, stupid me, why did I eat that cake yesterday?"
Then:
"I know - I just won't eat anything today - that will get me back to where I want to be...Great idea..."
The next step I would sabotage my dumb plan, like this:
"O.K., no breakfast, no big deal" then a bit later "I didn't eat anything, just this muffin won't hurt, oh, so good, maybe just one more, they're small, and then I won't eat anything else." Later I would think "It's bad to not eat a whole day, I should have lunch" and then justify a rather large enchilada with cheese, salad, & veggies.
By three I would completely forget all about my plans made in the shower, and eat the cookies dunked in milk alongside with my kids (fellowship - solidarity). By dinner I would feel guilty and eat extra to quiet my inner voice. Dessert? I blew it anyway, I might as well give up and start tomorrow... Then the whole thing starts again.
Jorge Cruise has a book called "8 Minutes In The Morning". His main idea is that by eating healthy and doing weight resistance you can lose up to 2 pounds a week. I used some of his ideas when I was in the thick of things. He addresses the problem I just talked about by using the example of Forrest Gump using what he calls "Result-Driven Questions". He says"
"Instead of asking himself, 'Why am I disabled' 'What's wrong with my legs?' or 'Why am I slower than all the other kids?' he asks questions such as, 'Why did God make me so special?' or 'Why am I so lucky to have these magic shoes?' or 'How do miracles happen everyday?"
By asking Result-Driven Questions, you are actually unable to focus on things that make you depressed or unmotivated. You have no option but to see things in a way that empowers you.
If you ask negatively driven questions such as "Why is it so difficult for me to lose weight?' or 'Why can't I lose weight?' or "What's my problem?' your answers will reveal all of the reasons why you can't lose the weight and will make you feel worse. Using RDQ's will give you the power to direct what you see and hear; they direct your emotions toward the results you want. You need to read and think about RDQ's each and every day.
Examples of this are: "What joy will I feel when I attain my ultimate body?
"How incredible will my life become when I am leaner?" "What extraordinary things will people say to me when I am leaner?" "What can I do today so that my weight loss plans run smoothly?" "How can I continue to create a weight loss support network?"
To this day I have a tendency to ask myself negative questions. I like writing this blog because I am reminding myself of something important. Tomorrow, If I don't like what I see because of weekend overindulging I am going to say, (in an optimistic voice) "well CJ, I am thinner than I was 2 years ago, I really did some good things and am well on my way to making this a lifestyle. I have succeeded in harder things than this, and I have God in my corner."
"...be of good cheer, little children; for I am in your midst, and I have not forsaken you...Pray always that you enter not into temptation..."D&C 61:36,39
12 comments:
Wow. It's like you reached into my head and stole my early morning script.
Thanks for the much needed uplift. It was a rough week last week. Which is going to make this week look sooooo good.
These always come at just the right time. I love the idea of result driven questions--thanks so much.
Thank you, thank you for the much needed post! Because of you I am looking on the positive side more often. This week my scale has gone up, and I have asked "why and what can I do". My answer has been, "it's that monthly thing, don't despair and wait it out!"
I just spent the last week at Disneyland, with my husband and no kids. I wasn't too careful about what I ate. I need some optimism to get back on the healthy eating train. Thanks for the help.
I loooove your thoughts on this. I was complaining that I'm still 2 pounds up from my low (even though that time of month is next week) and my dear husband said, "But you still weigh less than you used to."
Good self-talk. Duly noted and will be put to good use! I've so totally done that "not eat and more than made up for it later" thing.
Last week I made my goal of going to the gym 5 times. Two times in one day (when I took one son to the kid's class, I did some weight-training). So it was 4 days, but 5 times. It counts!
Thanks for all your advice and "reasoning" that we know we do to ourselves. This is EXACTLY what I needed this morning to get my but up and do some exercise! Thanks!!!
Another great post CJ! Not being so hard on ourselves is something WOMEN struggle with. Fat or thin. This is a great tool-positive questions.
CJ, you really need to consider compliling all these beautiful, inspiring messages into a book. Really. Such great inspiration! :)
I've had that morning. Good words.
It's almost eerie how precisely I fit this scenario. I start my healthy eating over about five times a week.
You have the most amazing insights. Thank you!
Thank you. I blew it today...but am better equipped now for tomorrow!
Kimberly, I hope your week is better than last!
Yvonne, you are welcome:)
mindy -I agree with your answer, keep the steady course. You are doing great!
Davis family - Disney land? welcome back!
Rebecca - you went to the gym 2 times in one day? that is the extra mile!
Eliza, let me know if it worked!
Thanks amy!
Megan - someone else was supposed to write that book!
Lucy, Denise - could we be separated at birth??
Kelly lady , could it be that you just used a RDQ??? way to go!
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