Some people have asked me how I started my weight loss. My first few months in the blog archive explain it all.

Friday, December 21, 2007

A Christmas Gift of Absolution.

I am beginning to think I am giving the wrong impression. Some feel guilt after reading my blog and feel I have some sort of super human faith, that I am a skinny girl who just prays and "poof" am delivered from temptation. One person told me she won't comment here because she feels too guilty and has no idea what to say. I think that this person misunderstands me.

I have been watched, but not consistently. If you really watched me you would know just how hard losing weight is and that sometimes keeping it off seems impossible. You would see how discouraged and overwhelmed I get. I blog of the things that work for me. I don't write the things I do that do not work, I figure everyone has figured that out for themselves.

Every day is hard. I am paddling the same boat as everyone else who loves sleep, food, and who is too busy to cut veggies every night. I haven't made bread in a week and today I made sugar cookies and ate 4 for lunch because I was mad at my husband. My knee hurts from running and my lungs hurt from a 3 week old cold so I have only been out twice this week. I feel like I walk a very thin line and that if left with out my little tricks I would daily bathe in butter, swim in chocolate, dive into eclairs and frequent places with drive through windows wearing sweats with no intention of sweating.

This month marks one year that I have stayed at the same weight plus or minus 5. I am truly astounded. It is a miracle. 90% of people who lose weight gain it back and that terrifies me. I held on to my fat clothes for months thinking I would fill them up soon enough, but the lessons have stuck. I have learned some tricks that make this road to health a bit easier.

Just think of me as a tutor. I can teach you some of the new rules of this foreign tongue. Though not fluent I speak it as much as I can, and with practice I plan on getting better each day. I absolve you of all guilt you may feel falling off the wagon if you will get right back on and cheer me on with you. I do not want to discourage anyone, I truly believe if I, who completly lacks any kind of will power can do this, so can you. Merry Christmas.


Yvonne said...

Oh, Calamity Jane, you are such an inspiration. Thank you for another great post. I was talking to one of my daughters in law about your blog and she loves it, too. We both think you are amazing!!! It is so tough some days to eat the right food and you help me realize where to get my help and that with the Lord's help I can do it. Please know how much you are appreciated.

I hope you have a very Merry Christmas.

Michal said...

I am so glad you blog, and don't feel like you come across as holier-than-thou. I love reading your blog. It validates me on my healthy days and helps me get perspective on my live-for-food days. Please keep being my tutor! And don't come visit my post that is a tribute to spritz!;)
Merry Christmas.

mindyluwho said...

Thank you for the gift...actually I have never felt guilty from reading your blog. I lost 30 pounds once and then gained it all back, so I know what a struggle it is to keep it off. I think it's harder than losing it because once you've lost the weight it's too easy to slip back into old habits. Then when the weight starts to come back bit by bit you're not in the same mind frame and it's hard to stop the gain.

You just keep the wagon rolling for us!

Merry Christmas!

Carrot Jello said...

You just tell that "one person" to get off her fat lazy bum and quit making excuses, and stop making out with her neighbors. Of all the nerve!
I bet she wears glasses and hasn't had her eyebrows waxed in months. Bet she needs a new bra. Throw in some new stretchy pants for her while you're at it.
Betcha she's rolling on the floor laughing because she thinks she's funny too.

Marc and Megan said...

The thing I love most about your blog is the encouragement, the motivation, the "I can do this, too" feeling I get every time I read what you write. And, the fact that I can apply whatever you're writing about to lots of other areas of life makes it that much more powerful.

Kimberly said...

I think we'll always feel that little niggling of guilt when we read of someone who's doing well with something we know we could be doing better at. It hurts. But it's a good hurt because we can turn it into self-improvement, you know?

Mostly, I don't feel guilty reading your blog. I feel like you're a human being, just as prone to fault as I am, but you've learned lessons I haven't yet. Teach away!

Tara said...

I love reading your thoughts. You are real and truly amazing.

I have zero doubt that you will be thin for the rest of your life!

Camille McInelly said...

Way to go ... what a landmark. You truly are amazing, and it's nice to know you are human too.

KellyLady said...

Congrats on your one year!!!! I am so proud of you and hope to follow in your footsteps. Love you!

Jill said...

I just stumbled on to your blog. I am currently in the "before" phase of weight loss, and this week has been a difficult one for me. Too many yummy things to eat.
Congratulations on your 1 year!